"A shark ate the internet" - excuses, excuses...

In a week when Nimda brought networks - public and private - grinding to a halt it seems rather churlish for a South-East Asian shark to add to the network manager's woes.

Yet according to a spokesman for Singapore Telecom, our cable-eating friend is the most likely cause of severe downtime between Singapore and the US, China and much of Europe.

Now, we've got no reason to disbelieve the spokesman quoted but as excuses go, 'a shark ate the internet' sounds awfully familiar. It's the 21st century's answer to that school day classic, 'the dog ate my homework' - an often used and utterly unconvincing excuse.

This got us thinking about the most spurious reasons for network failure.

A quick search through the silicon.com archives reminded us of KPN Qwest's net nightmares a couple of years back when a deep sea trawler cut through its cross-channel cables. More seriously, there was the tale of a Baltimore train crash this July that reduced parts of online America to a crawl.

We're sure you've got more. We want to uncover the world's worst excuse for network failure. So whether you've used it or just been on the receiving end, post your gems below by clicking on 'add comment' and we'll publish the best.