Broadband madness on 1:25,000 scale

Steve Ballmer this week offered slight consolation to the massed ranks of UK citizens who have been by-passed by high-speed internet access.

The Microsoft CEO admitted even he can't get broadband. And what does he do about it? Get his PA to harangue the telcos or throw some of his considerable fortune at the situation? Not at all. Like the broadband orphans of Britain, Ballmer sits on the phone pleading in person for high-speed web access - all to no avail.

The image of arguably the most powerful man in IT being unable to get broadband only serves to illustrate what an unprecedented farce the roll-out of this in-demand technology has become. It is certainly no respecter of reputation.

In the UK the road to broadband happiness is littered with similar ironies - consider this response we received to a recent broadband story from silicon.com reader Simon Appleby: "Our business is located immediately opposite BT's R&D centre, Adastral Park near Ipswich. Even we can't get Broadband."

We have also received countless responses from people living on the M4 corridor - many of whom are within a stone's throw of the UK headquarters of some of the world's largest technology firms. Can they get broadband? Of course not. The residents of 'Silicon Fen' in Cambridgeshire report similar woes.

Then there are the universities. The cutting edge of invention and innovation? Perhaps, but you might like to think twice about applying to the computer departments at Cambridge, Cardiff, Lancaster, Reading and Sussex to name just five, if high-speed web access is your bag.

But now we want to hear your examples of broadband madness and ADSL hell. Can you better these examples?

- Are you the only household in your street unable to get broadband?
- Do you live next door to BT CEO Ben Verwaayen and yet can't get broadband?
- Do you work all day installing broadband and yet return home to good old dial-up access?

We want to find the unluckiest broadband loser in Britain. Let the campaign begin.