A Hex on all your email policies

As the world attempts to return to normal after the events of 11 September (even if the word 'normal' has now been redefined), it's time to return to the realms of the weirdly wonderful IT industry.

After all, as one extremely interesting press release we received this week proclaimed: 'There's no business like ebusiness.'

Really, it did...

The website of the Helsinki stock exchange's high-tech index (otherwise known as HEX) revealed rather more than share prices this week. As many of you out there will know, companies often use dummy text to test out new or upgraded sites before they go live - the operative word there being 'before'.

Unfortunately for HEX, the distinction between 'before' and 'after' became blurred as the fickle hand of fate decided to press the 'go live' button a tad prematurely, revealing to the world a message which ran along the lines of:

"There is very little reliable information to be found here. We'll be mostly writing wrong market information to the investors so that they'll lose all their money. We'll carry on writing this chauvinistic nonsense and will be publishing the next installment of the diary of drunken idiots shortly."

A rare example of honesty in publishing there. If you fancy some more examples of embarrassing high-tech gaffes, see http://www.silicon.com/a45870 .

And if that tickles your fancy, why not join in the hunt for the world's funniest joke? We've collated a small handful so far, but we want more. Click here for more info - http://www.silicon.com/a47156 - and post yours as a reader comment.

Question: when's an email opt-out not an email opt out?
Answer: when you're an Egg customer.

And that's not a joke. We heard from one Egg Card holder this week, who tries to keep his inbox free of spam by always ticking those boxes at the bottom of company websites which should mean you won't get inundated with marketing info.

So you can imagine his bemusement when he received this mail from his bank:

"As a loyal Egg Card customer you may already know that we love asking you what you want from Egg. As a result of conversations with you guys we've got some good news about a new benefit for you. Enter Egg Rewards... Unfortunately we are a bit stuck here. Normally we would have liked to have told you in full what we have planned but you have asked not to receive that kind of communication from us. If you would like to know more about the programme, simply use the link below..."

Further down the mail was one very short sentence announcing a change to Egg's terms and conditions, which Egg (when challenged by our reader) used as justification for sending out the mail.

In other words, Egg doesn't go with spam (boom boom).

Meanwhile, NTL has been treading a fine line between protecting its customers and screwing more money out of them with its own email policies.

Another silicon.com reader told us how he'd emailed NTL to unsubscribe from his NTLWorld account.

NTL told him it couldn't react to his email because it's "against the Data Protection Act".

Strange that, considering the information commissioner is keen to encourage email correspondence between companies and customers, partly because it's quick.

NTL's action forced our reader into a series of phone calls before he finally resorted to writing a letter to NTL - a form of communication they did accept.

And the whole process only took two months... If you've had similar experiences with NTL or any other company, please email us (in confidence) at editorial@silicon.com .

NTL has also been rapped over the knuckles by the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) for publishing misleading information in a direct mailshot and in some regional press ads.

The offending bit of bumph reads: "NTL is the only digital TV service that gives you access to some of the world's best internet sites, for free."

Funnily enough, a lot of people have taken that to mean you can access the web through their TVs, which simply isn't the case.

NTL claimed that because it referred to internet sites rather than the web by name, its advertising wasn't misleading.

Yep, and I'm a Dutchman... The ASA gave NTL a good ticking off, only the ninth time this year it's been asked to look into NTL's marketing.

And penultimately, two facts which might make you go: "Cor, that's quite a lot, isn't it?"

The Mobile Data Association says that just over one billion text messages were sent by UK users - in one month alone (August).

And it's also now believed that around 15 billion emails are sent globally - every day.

Cor. That really is quite a lot, isn't it?

And finally, a quick word of thanks for the hundreds (and I mean hundreds) of emails we received in response to the recent events in America. The Round-Up wasn't its usual self last week for obvious reasons, but still managed to generate more response from you than it ever has before, much of it extremely moving.

If there was some way we could pass on your messages of condolence to everyone directly affected by the terrorist attacks, we would.

But if you are American, and/or know someone who was involved in the atrocities, it may be of some comfort to know that the people of this little island (and mainland Europe) are still thinking of you. Even the IT industry, which in its headlong pursuit of profit has not been known for its compassion, came to a complete halt, if only for a short time.

It sometimes feels disrespectful to get on with things as 'normal'. But the show must go on. After all, there really is no business like ebusiness...