The Weekly Round-Up: 05.03.04

This week, the Round-Up has been in gadget heaven with a brand, spanking new iPod Mini to play with (courtesy of hard-earned cash before you shout freebie).

Currently unavailable in the UK the Round-Up's iPod came all the way from Noo Yoik (appropriately the small Apple device from the Big Apple city) and quite frankly it is the sexiest thing we've seen in the silicon.com offices for quite some time.

While many iPod users will be Mac fans the majority of people buying the bi-platform MP3 player are likely to be Windows PC users and it seems Steve Jobs may have just done his old friend Bill Gates a bit of a favour.

The must-have appeal of the iPod mini, coupled with the fact that it doesn't work with Windows 98 or below means it is likely to be the latest driver for the implementation of Windows XP among home users.

And until the iPod mini hits UK shelves it would seem the traditional bidding of 'farewell', 'bon voyage' or 'have a safe trip' is being replaced by the far more modern 'anything but pink' when seeing off a friend heading to the States - its purpose being to dictate which colour iPod you want them to bring back for you.

However, while the Round-Up certainly put in an order of 'anything but pink' - and got its first choice silver - it would appear to be almost academic as you cannot get the rose-tinted devices for love nor money over the pond. And furthermore silver is apparently selling far slower than any other colour by far, as fashion takes precedent over function - a fact Apple has always struggled to distance itself from.

A report in The Times even quoted two women who, upon being told that pink, gold and green had already gone but there were plenty of silver, said:

"But who'd get silver?" asked the in-no-way-pretentious first woman. "Only a man!" replied the second, with The Times reporter adding that this response was delivered with "a scornful toss of her scarf".

It makes you wonder whether they want to use it or wear it - but word reaches the Round-Up of women being inconsolable upon receiving the bad news - "There are no pink iPods left in this store" - at the doorways of electrical retailers across the US.

More bad news this week, this time for foxes (as opposed to bad news for The Foxes - eh, Leicester City fans - there's been plenty of that lately).

A mad scientist (OK - he may not be mad but they generally are in the mind of the Round-Up) has designed a robot that he claims can hunt foxes far more effectively than a pack of dogs.

And Zoran Kostic from Serbia has his sights set firmly on the UK as a likely market for his robo-beagle (not to be confused with the small landing craft which UK scientists flew very fast into the surface of Mars last Christmas).

Still it won't quite have the same appeal for the bloodthirsty 'hoorays' chasing cunning Mr Fox through the meadows and woodlands of the UK. As if they don't look silly enough as it is, a robot dog will do little to improve their public image. But it could neatly sidestep legislation changes concerning 'hunting with dogs'.

Surprisingly, the machine doesn't work by confusing the fox to death - instead it is a high-speed pursuit robot which runs on caterpillar tracks, much like a mini tank, controlled by sensors and high-tech camera technology.

Presumably this will then be monitored by some kind of base-camp support team in constant communication with the front line troops on the hunt.

Did somebody say overkill? This sounds very much like a case of 'using a (robotic) sledgehammer to crack a nut'.

In short the Round-Up thinks this idea may be destined for the drawer marked "What on earth were you thinking?"

But Kostic claims robo-beagle - which as yet doesn’t have an actual name of its own - is better than real dogs because it is small enough to follow the fox into its den. Quite what it does when it's in there is anybody's guess because details are currently sketchy at best but Kostic claims all will become clear when the invention is unveiled in the near future.

But the Round-Up also worries about the effect sighting a robot dog charging over the brow of a hill may have on some of the simpler folk in the UK's more backwards rural backwaters where they are still coming to terms with the horseless carriage and the man in a box who reads them the news.

Of course, a more fundamental reason why there may little use for the robo-beagle (attempts to ban hunting altogether notwithstanding) is that Kostic probably isn't aware that any British fox with a brain in its head has moved out of the countryside and headed for the cities in search of upturned bins, discarded takeaways and refuge from in-breds on horseback.

And in the cities we already have machines for killing foxes - they're called cars.

Speaking of which, an advert for a flash two-seater sports car was brought to the Round-Up's attention this week on the Auto Trader website. (And how seamless was that link?)

It read:

"1993 Toyota Supra Twin Turbo Aero. Very rare, every toy, leather, mini disc, climate, traction, cruise, 18in alloys, brand new tyres, 0-60 in 5, 160+ mph, awesome..."

'So why is this chap selling a car which he so obviously loves?' you may ask. Well the ad goes on:

"...girlfriend forgot to take pill, gutted, £14,250."

How touching - the unmistakeable pride of a father-to-be. The glow, the excitement... the annoyance at having to sell his sports car and trade it in for something that will accommodate a baby seat.

You can see this being the cause of many an argument as the man cries openly at the wheel of his Ford Mundano or whatever drab family five-door he ends up driving, beating his head against the steering wheel and wondering where it all went wrong.

But you can bet the arguments between him and his girlfriend will be a lot less public than the in-fighting which is going on between the creators of the Bagle and Netsky viruses which have been doing the rounds these past few weeks.

It seems they have taken exception to each other's virus getting any publicity and detracting from their own time in the limelight. A vicious war of (badly written) words has erupted.

For example, hidden in the code of the latest Bagle iteration was the line: "Hey, NetSky, f*ck off you b*tch, don't ruine our bussiness, wanna start a war?"

We censored that - you can probably work out where - but rest assured the abysmal spelling was exactly as it appeared in the code. It would appear that viruses are pretty much all these individuals can write.

As if to prove the point - and to demonstrate that the appalling spelling exists on both sides of this petty squabble - the next Netsky iteration included the line: "Bagle - you are a looser!!!!"

Oh dear... back to school for them it would seem.

Also going back to school this week are IT security professionals who are heading off to be trained in the ways of the hacker.

Did somebody say recipe for disaster? After all - is it really wise to teach people such skills?

Of course the answer to that is a resounding 'yes'. In the same way locksmiths need to know how locks work, they need to know about the potential weaknesses and the fallibility. It's the same principle. People safeguarding anything should be aware of the ways in which it can be breached. That much is common sense.

The idea of techies putting systems and safeguards through their paces is nothing new - but the idea of an independent body doing the educating does represent a concerning shift and raises fears about the regulation of the course and its students.

The organisers, Training Camp, claim they will carefully screen anybody taking the course but there will be many who are concerned about how rigorous that process will be.

After all, screening processes are invariably prone to failure - with too many high-profile instances to mention - but even one case of a Training Camp-taught hacker involved in any kind of malicious activity will likely result in a very angry backlash about where these skills were learned.

Admittedly that fear of being torn to shreds in the media and in the industry - and you can bet there are one or two knives being sharpened as we speak - may be all the motivation the Training Camp needs to ensure its screening really is as rigorous as possible.

But how sure can anybody ever be that a so-called 'white hat' hacker (referring to the convention of the 'good guys' in westerns always wearing a white hat) won't be tempted to swap for a black hat if times change and circumstances dictate?

And it's a dirty world out there - a white hat over time may start to go a little grey and there are likely to be concerns over how 'white hat' hackers may be put to work by the employer who pays for them to take the course. After all, a lot of businesses in a lot of highly-competitive industries could probably find a few chores about the place for somebody trained in trespassing on other companies' networks.

OK - so maybe the Round-Up is being a little cynical and is sure the Training Camp would baulk at the suggestion it is teaching 'Industrial Espionage 101' but it's happened before and it will happen again.

And finally this week, dot-com tycoon Cliff Stanford, who made his money selling Demon Internet and founding Redbus, was due to appear in court this week to answer charges of blackmail relating to the alleged theft of emails from John Porter, former Redbus chairman and son of disgraced former politician Shirley Porter who - by the way - still owes Westminster Council £37m because of the 'homes for votes' scandal.

However, the hearing had to be postponed when "circumstances beyond his control" meant Stanford was unable to make it to Bow Street Magistrates.

And what were these "circumstances" of which his lawyer Alex Bailin spoke?

"He missed his flight this morning and contacted us to apologise."

Thank God the lawyer added that he phoned "to apologise". Tardiness, failure to attend court and alleged blackmail are just about forgivable but there really would be no excusing bad manners.

The Round-Up is now off to fill an iPod mini with 1,000 entirely legally acquired MP3 files.