The Weekly Round-Up: 21.09.07

Technology's very own Mr Rock 'n' Roll Steve Jobs jitterbugged into London town this week to announce the UK launch of the iPhone - looking nothing whatsoever like this.

His appearance at the Apple Store on Tuesday turned London's biggest free internet café for foreign exchange students into a mosh pit as the hoi polloi struggled to get a view of the great man himself and strained to hear his words above the dozens of Portuguese teenagers talking to their folks at home over Skype. (The RUp can in fact assure you it was a press-only event, if assure is the right word.)

When he took to the stage dressed in his usual garb of black turtleneck and jeans, Jobs formally announced the worst kept secret in technology and telecoms - that O2 had won the exclusive deal to be the carrier for the iPhone in Blighty (you can see some photos here).

By all accounts, the UK's network operators were falling over each other to work with Apple - with Jobs playing operators off each other. He told the gathered throng that of all the mobile networks in the UK, Apple chose the one that "felt like home". How does that work then?

Either way, O2 has become the winner of the coveted iPhone relationship in the UK, thus spurning the Round-Up's wish to see Apple engage with some hot fruit-on-fruit action in a deal with Orange. (Zut alors! That was, in fact, reserved for the French.)

Reports on the details of the deal are mixed with some sources claiming Jobs has negotiated a deal with O2 that will see the Silicon Valley company carry off a staggering 40 per cent of revenues from customers using the iPhone.

Seemingly undeterred by potentially seeing little profit out of the deal, O2's UK CEO said their research suggests 80 per cent of their high-value customers would like the phone and 40 per cent of customers on rival networks would switch to get their hands on it. A heady prize for a mobile carrier and a prediction given credence following Apple's announcement that it had sold a million of the devices in a paltry 74 days.

And recent research from no less a source than silicon.com this week suggests a third of those responding would cheerfully strangle a puppy to get their hands on the device. Or at least switch mobile network.

Those operators who missed out on the deal are unlikely to be placated by Jobs describing them as disgruntled "girlfriends". And let's face it nobody does, particularly disgruntled girlfriends and especially after they've found out you dumped them so you could get off with their so-called mate.

Jobs responded to a question about how the other UK operators felt about the negotiations with this rather mixed metaphor: "We dated a few people that we didn't marry and then we found someone we wanted to marry and we did. So there's a few upset girlfriends out there. It wasn't an economic choice, it was a cultural choice."

The Round-Up always selected its girlfriends on cultural rather than economic grounds. It's a fine way to select a partner. Though it doesn't make the pain of separation for the one that got away any less painful.

Meanwhile, in other iPhone-related news, another jilted girlfriend that Jobs left on the other side of the Atlantic seething over what could have been is Verizon Wireless, part owned by Vodafone. The company has firmly refuted claims it has taken a hit as customers left its network to sign up to AT&T, the US iPhone carrier.

Verizon admitted it had taken a hit when the iPhone first launched and another when Apple dropped the price in comical fashion by $200 leaving a million iPhone early adopters with nothing to console them except for a $100 voucher to spend on more Apple gear. (How many will go to an Apple store for the first time? Genius.)

Either way, Vodafone chief executive Arun Sarin is pretending he doesn't care about stupid Apple and their stupid iPhone. At least not until it joins the next wave of mobile telephony and joins the 3G phone club. Whatever, sweetheart. That ain't going to happen anytime soon, according to Jobs. It's the drain on the iPhone's precious batteries, you see.

Meanwhile, still on the iPhone front, a security consultant guaranteed himself some media coverage this week by claiming both the Apple device and social networking site Facebook - two brands surfing the tech zeitgeist - are a heinous threat to life as we know it.

Facebook, the iPhone and operating systems were all named and shamed as the weak links in the IT security chain by a group of security experts.

Speaking at a security summit, Gartner analyst John Pescatore said consumer applications devices - such as Facebook and the iPhone - will "sneak into" the business world, even though many companies' first reaction will be to ban these sites and devices.

Companies banning the iPhone? For what purpose? It is after all a smart phone, albeit without Exchange interoperability. Just because it's an Apple device why should it be considered a threat? Why should it "sneak" surreptitiously into the business world? What silliness.

Pescatore added: "We knew as soon as we saw the iPhone that [company] managers would want one and read [corporate] emails on this device."

Absolutely, how disgraceful that the OS X-run device - did someone mention security? - should also be a desirable gadget.

Then again, perhaps the Round-Up is missing the point and, let’s face it, it won't be the last time...

'Only connect'. So wrote impressively moustachioed English novelist EM Forster at the beginning of Howards End. It's a favourite phrase of the Round-Up's, applicable in a whole number of scenarios.

For example, like Forster, you could use it in the context of a sweeping romance between social classes in England at the turn of the 20th century.

Or you could use it to describe the yawning communications gulf that exists between techies and lawyers. And, to be honest, that’s just where the Round-Up is headed with this.

IT chiefs and lawyers must learn to speak the same language if they are to work together to help their organisations eliminate risk.

Basically, the gist is that it's vital that the IT crowd is consulted, agrees with and has ownership of any policies that directly affect them. This is to be achieved through good communication between legal and technical teams. They need to talk to each other.

Now this is precisely where the problems start.

If there were ever a profession more steeped in jargon and technical gobbledygook than technology it's law.

David Lodge, UBS global head of IT risk control but presumably not the noted academic and novelist, said techies should make the effort to try and communicate with legal eagles in a language other than "IT speak".

Lodge added: "But lawyers being lawyers, it is very difficult to work with them to understand what we want [and] if they could talk to us in an IT language life would be much easier."

Maybe we should be looking at some sort of middle ground, some kind of corporate Esperanto. A lingua franca for the 21st century business world that combines the very best of IT and legal jargon. A heady mix of three-letter acronyms, neologisms, buzzwords and Latin.

Carpe Diem...

The latest scheme to try and convince the youth of today that a career in technology isn't just about three-letter acronyms, neologisms and buzzwords was launched this week with a misplaced sense of giddy optimism.

According to a statement from e-skills UK, the ‘Revitalise IT’ scheme will aim "to transform the attitudes of young people to IT-related education and careers and support universities in developing and promoting courses that reflect the needs of IT professional careers".

The scheme will have two parts. The first is called 'Ambition' and will attempt to change attitudes towards IT degrees and careers. The second part is called ‘Catalyst’ and will promote the skills graduates develop from different types of IT-related degree courses.

Let's be honest, it sounds like a tough journey ahead. Will the kids buy into it?

Perhaps brutal honesty is the best approach…

"Look, it's not the sexiest job ever. But the money's pretty good, especially if you can learn Java, and while you probably won't be able to date any of your co-workers you will at least be able to secretly read their email. Yeah, so it's not company policy but so what - even if you do lose your job - are you bovvered? There's a skills crisis going on. You can easily get another one. Sorted. Think about IT."

The Round-Up's sure you can do better. What messages would you send the youth of today? Email your ideas to editorial@silicon.com.

Finally this week, trouble is afoot on the $100 laptop project championed by MIT MediaLab founder Nicholas Negroponte.

For starters, despite a wealth of publicity and global media goodwill, the project still hasn't got any customers.

The other problem is that the $100 laptop is now going to cost $188. What's in a name, eh?

The Round-Up's not an expert on this but surely if your product isn't selling the last thing you want to do is raise the price to almost double what it was originally marketed at?

Nonetheless, a spokesman for the One Laptop Per Child Foundation's XO said the laptop will sell for about $188 with production slated to begin in October.

The spokesman added: "We are testing it. We are making sure all the software works. We are making all the corrections on it that need to be made before the product comes out."

The Foundation plans to sell the computers directly to governments, which will provide the laptops to school children at no cost.

Despite not having announced any customers so far the project isn't getting too downhearted. Hell no. "We are not disclosing any orders until we have a final computer," the spokesman said. "We are in talks with dozens of countries."

The foundation has also said it may sell the laptop on the commercial market as well. Though at a higher price still. Uh-huh.

If the project is a success, it could pressure the rest of the computer industry to start offering similar machines.

The Round-Up thinks, rather regrettably for the worthy project, that the key word in the last sentence is 'if'.

Until next week, don't forget you can check out the Weekly Round-Up in its podcast incarnation here or subscribe to it via iTunes.