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The Weekly Round-Up: 01.02.08
Mac cool kids and PC dweebs...

By silicon.com

Published: Friday 01 February 2008

Mac users are a bunch of arrogant, self-satisfied gits.

At least that's the view you could come to looking at some recently unveiled research into the demographics of modern computer users. (The Round-Up added the bit about 'gits').

Actually, the agency focused on Apple versus PC users and found Mac people are pretty much exactly the same as the way Apple depicts them in its 'Get a Mac' ads.

Quick recap: Mac guy is young, hip and very pleased both with himself and his purchases; PC guy is dull, flabby and obsessed with spreadsheets and very likely to be unsuccessful with members of the opposite sex.

The researchers reported that Mac users are indeed more assured of their superiority, less modest and more open than the general population, which suggests why they're willing to take a chance on switching to a different computing platform.

Given that PC users make up the vast majority of the computer-using world it comes as no great shock that there were far fewer "cohesive personality traits" among the throng, reports Advertising Age. (Though this guy would certainly disagree with all of that…)

However, one area where PC users did stand out as being different statistically from their Mac-using brethren was in creativity - much lower, apparently.

Mindset Media found PC users to be realists who are emotionally steady and work well with what tools and roles they're given.

'Drones'. The word is 'drones', people. They've given up and are just fuelled by a sense of futile despair, following whatever tasks are allotted to them by their Mac-using overlords.

So why could Mac users be more self-satisfied and feel superior? Let's take an analogy - and being a dyed-in-the-wool traditionalist the Round-Up's going to use the usual car analogy to differentiate between Macs and PCs.

Tradition dictates that a Mac is a BMW or Mercedes whereas a Windows PC is a Vauxhall Astra or a Ford Mondeo. Both fine cars by the way. Rather dull but fine nonetheless.

They get you from A-B but not in as much style and you may feel slightly embarrassed and underwhelmed with the experience.

Some people accuse other people who drive Mercedes as being smug and self-satisfied. This is almost certainly because they drive a Mercedes. Wouldn't you be? The Round-Up certainly would.

The same applies to Mac users. After all, they pay a bit more and get computers that are shiny, don't get loads of viruses and generally work when they're switched on. You pay a bit less for a PC and you get, well, you get what you pay for.

For completeness' sake, Linux-driven PCs can be a Mercedes, too. What's more you can get one for free.

You just need to assemble it yourself.

Also according to the Advertising Age article, Mac users also have a tendency to be more open (tarts), environmentally aware (are you listening Greenpeace?) and socially and politically liberal (tarts verging on slappers).

However, and here comes the money quote. They also "shy away from looking to religious or moral leaders for guidance".

Are you quite mad? Have you ever seen the crowd at a Steve Jobs keynote? They're like entranced cult members dutifully sipping their Kool-Aid. And that's just the press pit.

Of course, the Round-Up's made a terrible mistake here. It has made gross generalisations in that last sentence - and possibly others - and making gross generalisations about people is a stupid thing to do. Sorry.

It's a particularly stupid thing to do for a living but then again that's marketing for you...

It's rare that a week goes without the Round-Up having a pop at HMRC and this one is no exception.

This time, to make a refreshing change, it has nothing to do with lost personal data. Instead, the latest cock-up by everyone's favourite government department is to do with its website, or rather the lack of it.

During yesterday morning and early afternoon, users trying to access the Self Assessment Online section of the HMRC website were confronted with the message 'Online Service Temporarily Unavailable'.

Yesterday, lest we forget was the deadline for the submission of tax returns. Anyone who failed to submit their returns after the date faced a potential £100 fine.

Around 3.6 million people filed their returns online this year, up more than half a million on 2007. HMRC also said that around 104,000 people successfully completed their transaction on the site before the crash occurred.

Helpfully, HMRC was also kind enough to remind people about it, with large adverts with the message in very big, red letters: "31 Jan. A little reminder about your tax return."

Given the site outage, that's now had to be changed to: "1 Feb. A little reminder that we forget to chuck a few extra servers at our site." Or something like that.

Actually, what it has said is that as long as you submit your returns by midnight tonight (1 February), they won't fine you. Which is rather jolly considerate of them, all things considered.

A silicon.com reader unable to get onto the Self Assessment site contacted the HMRC helpline and was told the problem was due to the high volume of people trying to access the service.

A huge swell of traffic on the very last day users could submit their forms. Now who could have possibly foreseen that? Answers on a postcard, please. Actually, forget that, they'll probably never get here.

By the way, still no sign of those CDs...

Angry? Stressed? Morally outraged and not even a Daily Mail reader?

If you answered 'yes' to any of the above then you may be a victim of the latest technology-related malaise sweeping the nation - fat pipe rage.

A survey by O2 Broadband reports that we're going postal over our fast internet connections. What's more we're taking out our frustrations by physically attacking our hardware, which is a bit unfair as strictly speaking it's not our hardware that's making us unhappy.

More than half (56 per cent) of Brits polled admit broadband issues have made them lose their rag with their hardware.

Broadband consumers in Cardiff are most likely to get techno-rage, while users in Bristol are the most dissatisfied with their service (and are turning to the industrial-strength cider to drown their sorrows, the Round-Up assumes).

Brighton residents are the most self-satisfied and savvy when it comes to broadband - probably due to a high percentage of Mac-using alphas.

On the flip-side of the coin, the residents of Sheffield need more help than anyone else setting up their broadband access.

Which is a bit ironic given that Sheffield-born Sean Bean does all the voiceovers for O2's adverts.

But the UK's fat pipe-related frustrations don't stop at speed, hell no. Customer service is also a pain in the derriere for 20 per cent of respondents who claimed they have difficulty getting through to their provider.

The majority described being put on hold as one of the most stressful situations of daily life.

Most stressful situation of daily life? Ever get the impression that we've lost all sense of perspective as a nation?

Meanwhile, more than one million Brits are spending at least six hours setting up or troubleshooting their service, with one in five having to contact their provider at least three times to resolve problems.

The Round-Up's guessing there's a fair chance that there's a disproportionately high number of calls to the call centre with a 0114 prefix.

However, despite your frustrations about speed and customer support just feel grateful that your broadband service doesn't stink of sewage...

In other news this week:

MySpace is following Facebook's lead and will be opening its platform for developers. The social networking site has decided the best way of maintaining its lead over its up-and-coming rival is to complement its pages with a load of unparalleled tat.

Did the Round-Up just write "unparalleled tat"? What it meant was "value-adding third-party applications". Sorry about that. You can probably get a more balanced view of the news by clicking on the link to the article. This one here: http://networks.silicon.com/webwatch/0,39024667,39169855,00.htm

Also, a quarter of US users are happy to risk having their iPhones bricked by Apple by shifting to networks other than AT&T.

And finally, the Round-Up loves the smell of Information Commissioner Richard Thomas in the morning, it smells like victory.

Last, but not least, don't forget to get your weekly fix of funny with the silicon.com Podcast.

Plus get quips at the ready in this week's caption competition.